Alcoholics Anonymous

“My name’s Pitching the World, and I’m an alcoholic.” Yep, this was me earlier this morning at AA in Belsize Park, London. Good, isn’t it? And perhaps not too much of a surprise for many of my regular readers. What I thought was a pretty laboured comic device and simply a prolonged (15 year) period of heavy drinking has actually turned out to be good old fashioned alcoholism. I realised this on Tuesday after starting the day with two Valium washed down with a Pernod and brandy cocktail, although ‘cocktail’ is used in a very loose sense. It was then, really, that I realised I wasn’t simply a heavy social drinker as my Tuesday morning party was a sad, slightly scary one-man affair.

So I’m off the booze. For a bit at least. Good news for my pitching, bad news for what was an often colourful blog.

Wish me luck. Oh and I’m no longer in Bournemouth, I’m living in Clapton. At least I’m living in Clapton until Monday when I become homeless. Wish me more luck.


9 responses to “Alcoholics Anonymous

  1. Hi Pitchyyyyyyyyy

  2. Sorry to hear this though it’s a typical drug abuse story. Temptation to have some beers or a glass of bourbon after a day’s work should be nipped in the bud – by that I don’t mean replace booze with cannabis – as abusing that or any drug is no good for work. True of anything from caffeine on up.

    I should probably practice what I preach; my desk has a drinks cabinet drawer with an assortment of spirits. A bag of ice is never absent from the freezer. I exaggurate my boozing for comedic effect, but franklyI question that humour the true magnitude when stories such as yours emerge.

    Good luck: I mean that. I think your frank writing is something we could use more of amongst journalists. Many don’t realize or acknowledge they’re in quicksand until its shoulder-high.

    Pete, editor at Dirty Garnet.

  3. PTW! Wishing you much luck! well done for taking this first step. One day at a time. And booze + Valium sounds more dangerous than colourful, right?

    Look at me spelling color with a u! It’s the dissertation. I’m forced to write Brit-style (or ‘properly’ as James says). It’s growing on me. Like a fungus.


  4. Christopher Goodfellow

    Pitchy, no doubt more colour will ensue. Hope everything’s getting better, little by little. My thoughts are with you. C

  5. Thanks very much for the support everyone. Especially you Alun. I’ll be putting up some new pitches soon. After all, that’s sort of what this blog is about.

  6. Who the fuck is this Alun character? If it’s some fuckwit impersonating me, there’s going to be hell to pay. If not, there’s still going to be hell to pay, because ‘Alun’ is a made-up name and Pitchy’s got a new favourite.

    Pitchy, if you’re an alcoholic, am I an alcoholic? I did end up breaking in to my parents’ house two days ago and skulling all the beer I could find, because I’d been waiting around for nearly ten minutes and there was a chance nobody would be back for up to another fifteen. I owe them a new window now. Is that bad? I thought that’s exactly the kind of thing that gets written of as youthful (maybe not in your case) japery? Anyway, I’ve got two weeks off now so fuck off the AA and come down Finsbury Park tomorrow morning for K-Ciders and snouts. Simples.

  7. Alan says…“Pitchy, if you’re an alcoholic, am I an alcoholic?”

    Not to me sir! You’re a fine, upstanding man of sufficient self-righteous honesty to become a successor to the esteemed, unconceited, moral paragon… Ann Widdecombe.


  8. Pitchy, remember Winstons words. Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.

    Alan, go find your parents.

  9. No need, fake Alun, I’ve already found yours. Your mum’s the nuts.

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