I’ve been wanting to write for Men’s Health for years. The magazine pays very well, sells lots of copies and if I featured in an edition and received one free in the post then I could learn how to build big arms fast and please my lover. The people at Men’s Health must know how to do these things as, for the past ten years, whenever I see a copy in the newsagents these straplines* are plastered across the front.
Now, I know slagging off a magazine within seconds of pitching it is not the way to go, but once you read the below you’ll realise that my pitch has less than zero chance of getting scooped up, so what the hell.
And by the way, dear readers, the irony of one of the unhealthiest men in the country pitching a magazine exclusively dealing with the health and well-being of men has not escaped me.
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” Or so said Winston Churchill. But perhaps he was wrong, perhaps it should be: “If you’re going through hell, stay there for a bit.”
Let me explain.
The last few months have been tricky: my marriage has broken down, I’m being treated for alcoholism and I’m practically homeless. My Dad hasn’t spoken to me since I posted a semi-jokey comment on my blog about having a nervous breakdown on holiday. I had to be carried off a football pitch recently by four men after getting cramp. My hair’s falling out. So, yes, things not good.
And yet, in some ways I’m feeling better than I have done for years: they do say that tough times make tough people and I feel as if I’m coming out of this tough part of my life stronger, fitter, more confident and…well, perhaps not ready to take on the world, but certainly ready to take on some of it. So how about a feature on how your readers can deliberately put themselves through testing situations – physically, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, financially and so forth – and come out of the other side better people?
Happy to flesh out with examples if you’re at all interested. And if you’re not, this quote from Proust may help to convince you: “Happiness is beneficial for the body, but it is grief that develops the powers of the mind.”
Probably won’t help convince you though having re-read it. I have better quotes.
* I think I mean coverlines